Bacon Baby has Arrived!

Hello Everyone! I haven't updated the blog in a while and thought you all would want to know the good news... Baby G has arrived! She was born on October 9th at 9:06 am after 10 hours of labor weighing in at a whopping 7 lbs 13 ounces and 21 inches long. Our original due date was October 20th, but I had a feeling she wanted to arrive early and boy did she ever! The above picture is of her immediately after delivery and the one below is of her and I immediately after. Isn't she a cutie? Well, clearly I'm biased, but even if I wasn't I'm sure I'd still think she's a cutie. ;)

This picture is after we got her home. She's just maxin' and relaxin'. 

So, what's up with the title of this post you ask? Well, I'm here to tell all the pregnant ladies as you get closer to delivery watch what you eat! The day before she was born I had a wonderful breakfast with lots of bacon. Immediately after pushing her out I started to smell a familiar smell. 'What is that familiar smell?' I thought to myself...then they placed her on my chest and it hit me - the familiar smell was bacon!! My amniotic fluid was scented in bacon and so was Baby G! 'No one warned me about this' I thought as I looked around the room wondering if anyone else noticed the bacony smell. (No one seemed to, but I can't be too sure they didn't. Most likely they did smell it but were polite and just didn't say anything, but who knows.) This is a warning to pregnant ladies everywhere, be very aware of what you eat before you deliver because it will come back to haunt you! My advice is - if you want to test out the folks doing your delivery eat something like bacon (meaning something with a distinctive smell...or just eat some bacon) and play Guess What I Ate This Morning in the delivery room.

Any who, I hope all is well with you all! Better get back to my little pumpkin....later gators!

Maternity Pictures and Random Stuff

Thought I'd share a few more of the maternity pictures with you all. Again, this is me a little over 32 weeks. The photos were done by Olga Thomas Photography - and I think she did a fabulous job. I don't think I've ever felt as comfortable being nearly naked around someone after having known them for just an hour before. :)

In other news, Binderclips went to China a little over a month ago. When he was gone he ate all kinds of stuff that he had never eaten before... After he came back I was watching Andrew Zimmern's show Bizarre Foods and they mentioned that they eat a lot of donkey in China. This prompted me to send Binderclips the following text (he was at work, so no I did not text him while we were in the same house/room or whatever you might be thinking, however I would not put that past us):

Hey, while you were in China did you eat any donkey? I hear it's popular there...

To which he responded with the following:

What on earth is this about donkey?!...some things did taste like ass - but I thought that was just me.

Any who, I'm going to keep this short - I need to go be overly anxious about if our little girl is going to show up early (as I'm typing this I'm saying to her out loud "please don't come early, please don't come early..." over and over again). I just have a feeling she wants to get out of there early. Good news is she gets the hiccups often so I know exactly where she is. So, far she's down (she dropped a couple of weeks ago) but I do not want her out if you get my drift.

Also, just so everyone knows I literally look like I swallowed a watermelon now. Binderclips thinks this is hilarious since we fight about watermelons often. Just thought you all should know. Ok, I'm outta here.

Later gators!

Slip N' Slide (But Not the Fun Kind) Part 2

This is part 2 to my last post. Read on....

As soon as we arrived at the emergency room we told the woman at the ER desk what had happened. Immediately they got me a wheelchair and made me get into it, apparently when you come in with issues during pregnancy they do not let you walk to the labor and delivery department. As soon as I sat down in it I started to cry. The mere thought of having to get into a wheelchair terrified me and here I was in one. Somehow it made the whole situation even more real than it was on the way there. Binderclips saw me starting to cry and began to comfort me - telling me everything was going to be ok. In my mind I thought 'But I'm in a wheelchair, they don't make people who are fine get into a wheelchair!!' However, when I looked up at him I knew that I was just making it a bigger deal than it actually was, at least I hoped that was the case.

We arrived up in the labor and delivery department shortly after. Once in our own room I got into a gown and the nurse hooked me up to the external fetal monitor. The monitor has 2 bands that go around your abdomen; 1) to measure the baby's heart rate and 2) to measure if you are having contractions. Aside from worrying about not hearing our little one's heart beat (since they usually turn the speakers up so you can hear the heart beating) I was not concerned about having contractions or being in labor.

Boy was I ever wrong, I WAS having contractions - regular contractions, about every 3 minutes apart. I didn't even realize that that's what they were honestly, but it helped me identify what contractions felt like. I have a high pain tolerance, so I didn't find them painful at all just felt like I had to go the bathroom really bad...like, every 3 minutes.

Anyways, at this point a calm came over me, I still wasn't worried about delivering the baby that day (for some reason the reality of the situation didn't hit me) - then, I looked at Binderclips' face. He was trying to remain calm on the exterior but I could tell inside he was freaking out. It was at that point that he was near tears and that I realized that I could have the baby that day. All of a sudden I was terrified, but I tried to remain calm myself. I focused on the sound of the baby's heart beat. It was beating regularly and it was very strong.

The nurse began talking to us and telling us that the hospital we were in did not have a neonatal intensive care unit, so if the contractions didn't stop we'd be shuttled to another hospital that did. I'm pretty sure, almost simultaneously, Binderclips and I both realized the baby might be coming that day.

All I could think was 'we are not ready for this baby yet, what are we going to do? We aren't even home and by our doctor.' I also started to worry as to if the baby would make it our not, I mean, I was only 28 weeks along. At this point to say I was terrified is an understatement.

They started an IV and began loading me up with fluids, sometimes (in fact, many times) loading up on fluids stops the contractions. The good news is that this was the case for me. After 2-3 hours the contractions stopped, thank goodness. We didn't end up having the baby that day and are very thankful for that.

What I can tell you is even with some scares we've had since that day, I cannot recall a scarier day in my life so far. The situation made me realize that there is no other person in this world that I would have wanted by my side other than Binderclips. Not to end on a sappy note, but it was sincerely a life changing experience.

Any who, I hope all is well with you guys. I'm sorry I haven't posted or read any blogs lately. I'm doing fine, just very, very tired and BIG (read: uncomfortable). The picture above is one of our maternity pictures, it's me at 32 weeks (I'll share some others soon). Right now I'm 37 weeks along and the time is going by soo quickly!!

The news I will share with you before going is that we are having a girl!!!! YAY!! (We would've been happy either way honestly.) I'll try to post again soon. Later gators!

Slip N' Slide (But Not the Fun Kind)

This is a picture of me at 7 months pregnant (yep I am now the proud owner of a very obvious baby bump). I'm with my brother and his girlfriend (who have helped us tremendously with everything - thanks again guys!!!).

We all remember Slip n' Slides, right? Weren't they fun? I remember as a kid I would get really excited about being able to go on one. The wet plastic-y surface was something that my brother and I could not resist. We'd be soo excited to jump on the long plastic surface being doused with water and slide down it at full speed (even though it was likely one or both of us would end up hurt in some way or another).

I also remember being at a fraternity party a long time ago and them having one there. I didn't go on it. To me, it seemed like a bad idea (I mean like a really bad idea, like deciding to try to body surf on the top of a car moving at 100+ miles per hour) to combine alcohol consumption with Slip N' Slide usage (honestly, there should probably be a law against it, talk about dangerous).

Anyways, what I have to share with you today does have to do with slipping and sliding, but believe me it does not involve an actual Slip N' Slide (Binderclips won't even let me get gas on my own at this point in time, so you can imagine how he would feel about me wanting to go on a Slip N' Slide).

Our baby shower was scheduled to be on 7/30 in Michigan, however we arrived in Michigan on 7/28 and planned on working from my In-Laws' home on 7/29. The morning of 7/29 things were going somewhat as planned (we didn't have internet access, which we both needed to do our jobs, but Binderclips was working on it). I got us some breakfast and took Binderclips his up the stairs to where he was working to make sure he ate something (a hungry hubs = a grumpy hubs and a grumpy hubs is not my favorite kind). I had put on my running socks since I find them to be super comfy (they're as comfy as slippers honestly) to walk around in.

Anyways, as I descended down the stairs with Binderclips' bowl in my right hand the stairs became my own personal Slip N' Slide. The combination of my running socks and the carpet (well and probably my changed center of gravity due to being pregnant) resulted in me slipping down the last 3 stairs. I landed on my butt, but I landed hard people. So hard, that as soon as I landed I felt major cramping in my abdomen start to happen immediately.

I sat there for a minute just holding my abdomen like my insides might spill out if I didn't, then Binderclips yelled down to me "Are you ok? What happened down there?" "I slipped down some stairs, but I think I'm ok. Just sitting here resting for a minute" I responded. "How many stairs?! OMG!" he said, following it up with "It sounded like a hard fall from up here".

As I sat there I kept telling myself the cramping 'will go away if I just sit here for a little bit', but it didn't. I got up and the cramping remained. It was then I decided to call my doctor back in Wisconsin. They told me to go to the nearest emergency room (ER) immediately. I began to cry. Hubs was already stressed out enough about us not having internet connectivity and now I needed to go to the ER to have them do some fetal monitoring to make sure nothing happened to the baby. This wasn't going to be good.

It was at this point he came in to the room I was in and saw me crying. Worried he asked "What did they say?" When I told him we needed to go to the ER there was no hesitation in his voice as he said "Let's go now."

Soon after we were on our way to the ER. On the way there we talked about how we were sure it would be fine, that once on the monitor we'd see the baby's heart beat and they'd discharge us soon after. I wish it would have happened that way, but it didn't. To be continued....

French Toast Failure = Motherhood Failure?

Look how happy I am that I no longer throw up daily, now I'm just hungry constantly!

While Callie gets swallowed up whole by our lovesac I pose for the camera (aren't I sweet?). This is me at 27 weeks. I will be 28 weeks this Thursday (geesh, where does the time go?!) 

About a month or so back I woke up in a panic. I mean a real panic people. I nearly felt like I was hyperventilating. After I calmed myself down I still could not get what had me in a panic off my mind, although I didn't know if it was something I could talk to Binderclips about - so, I kept it to myself.

Well, as the day progressed I got more and more distracted by my thoughts. Finally, I must have looked distraught because Binderclips asked me what was wrong. All I could say to him is "how about we have French toast for breakfast tomorrow?" (We never eat French toast or sweet-type stuff for breakfast EVER.) He responded with "Oh, ok, sure" in a very confused tone, then said "but you still didn't tell me what's wrong."

I thought I had by asking him about the French toast, but clearly he missed the very obvious response. So, I responded with "Well, it has to do with the French toast" as I started to tear up. With a concerned look on his face he responds with "Ok, sounds like we need to talk about it." "I'm not sure I can talk about it without crying" I say. "I've seen you cry before, so I think we're covered there" he says as serious as he can.

"Ok, well I'm afraid..." I start sobbing "thatifIcantmake" I sob a little harder so that the words become unrecognizable for the rest of the sentence "fren..most..mumble (sob) mumble (sniffle) mumble (trying to catch my breath)..ure" I say as I wipe the tears from my eyes, then look up at him. Binderclips gets me a kleenex then just gives me a hug, I'm certain at this point he thinks 'man, this must be some traumatizing French toast experience to have her so upset' as he tries to comfort me. He lets me cry it out a little before trying to talk to me again.

"So, let me get this straight - we need to have French toast for breakfast tomorrow but it makes you really upset?" he asks. "Did you have a bad experience with French toast at some point? I mean whatever it did to you I am a man and can certainly take care of this terrible French toast" he says acting all macho. Then he follows it up with "We can make the French toast then chop it up into teeny tiny pieces, then eat it for punishment...is that what you had in mind?" he asks with hope in his voice. I suspect it was at this point he probably thought I'd start laughing also, but I didn't - I just started crying more.

"No" I say as I try to calm myself down. I wipe the tears that are pouring from my eyes away, then take a couple of deep breaths. I calm down enough so that I can explain and say "If I can't make French toast I'm afraid I'll be a failure of a mom" then look at him with what I'm guessing are as close to puppy-dog eyes I can have. I suspect this because I kind of see him start to laugh, then he sees me and tries to maintain his composure. "Ok, well I know you're going to be a great mom and I'm sure the French toast will be a success" he says. This makes me feel better, but the rest of the night I keep thinking about if I fail at it, I just would not/could not calm down until I successfully made the French toast.

The next morning I did succeed, but as I thought about it more I wondered why that defined me being successful as a mom. I think it's because my Dad used to make my brother and I French toast all the time when I was little and I always looked up to him so much that I wanted to believe our little bundle would feel the same way about me. I will say, that I hope it's for more than just making French toast, but I blame the pregnancy for my unstable mental state that lead to this incident. Let's hope that goes away after the baby comes! :)

This prompted me to think about the actual things that I think would define me as a good/successful mom. Some of the things on my list are having patience, being caring, leading by example, teaching to value relationships over material items, being disciplined, giving discipline, and giving motivation (just to name a few). What defines you guys as successful people in your own lives? I'd love to hear if you want to share!

Have a great day everyone! Later gators!

Vietnamese Waltz & Baby Bump Update

With the popularity of dance shows these days, we all have been able to see many different types of dances performed. In fact, these different types of dances have become more well known to society than ever....well, some members of society, but not all. Case and point - Binderclips and I are watching TV one night and the following transpires:

We're watching So You Think You Can Dance and they announce that one of the couples is going to perform the Viennese Waltz next.

Binderclips: "Really?!" he says surprised as he looks at the TV (as if he and it are having a conversation or something)


Hulabuns: I look at him very confused, then look at the TV with the same confused look as if I've missed something it's said. I even think 'Did I miss something?' to myself.


Binderclips: He's staring at the TV baffled as if the TV is providing some long explanation as to what he's so surprised about


Hulabuns: I, again, look at the TV confused wondering what on EARTH he's doing and having an imaginary conversation with it about. I say "What is going on here?" looking at him then at the TV and back again while making a hand motion back and forth as well.

Binderclips: "I didn't know the Waltz was a Vietnamese dance" he says as serious as can be.

Hulabuns: I bust out laughing

Binderclips: "What!?" he says still as confused as ever

Hulabuns: I respond with "It's Viennese NOT Vietnamese" still laughing

I love my life. lol

Any who, here are some updated pictures...just a warning, I've really blown up since my 23 week pictures. Today I'm 25 weeks and a day and I feel the baby moving all the time. In fact, Binderclips can feel it move also. It's great.

Hope you enjoy the pictures! Have a great weekend. Later gators!!

PS We successfully got moved - YAY! That's why the LoveSac (Larry the LoveSac) is all wrapped up in the background...just fyi :)

Morning Beauty

I looked in the mirror today to be confronted with this:

I was really impressed with the mere height of it, the picture below shows that a bit better though (as creepy as I look in it). lol

If you're asking yourself if I decided to try a new hairstyle, the answer is no. I woke up like this, and I will tell you that I'm very familiar with crazy hair (I have naturally curly hair, so my hair can be classified as "crazy" 95% of the time), but I've never woken up with it looking quite like this before. Don't I look beautiful? Ok, don't answer that - I really don't want to know the answer. In any event, I felt like I needed to share how I looked with you all. A bit embarrassing? Maybe. But I'm ok with that (you all remember my Conversation with a Llama and My Halloween Costume idea posts, right?). Embarrassing myself is one of the things I do best, so why not laugh with you guys?

In other news, Binderclips and I have been packing for our next move (can't you tell by all the boxes in the background?). Yes, we did just move not too long ago, but now we're moving to an apartment in the same complex with NO STAIRS. Our current place has approximately 40 and going up and down 40 stairs with a baby just doesn't seem like the best way to go. So, they're letting us move into a lower unit with no stairs, thank goodness. Wish us luck on the packing! We got a lot done last weekend, but still have a lot to do this weekend.

I know you guys are probably getting sick of seeing these pictures, but why not bore you with some more? Below are my recent belly pictures. I'm 23 weeks today and my belly has blown up! Yesterday, I said to Binderclips "My belly is really getting big, isn't it?" He didn't respond at all (which is not uncommon, he's usually not really paying attention to me, especially right after work when he still has work on his mind). So, I said "Do you hear me? I'm trying to conversate with you..." To which he responded "Yeah, sorry. I want to conversate with you too" but then gave me a look like conversate meant something else (boys will be boys I guess). "I'm serious. Do you see this?" I said pointing to my belly "It's really starting to stick out there." In which he responded with "You really want to talk about this? 'Cause I don't think it's a good idea."

I did want to keep talking about it, but he did have a point. When we were taking a labor and delivery class a couple weeks back he made the mistake of telling me I looked as big as the lady who was 7 months pregnant. (In his defense he meant that she looked really small for being 7 months, so he didn't mean any harm by the comment. But, of course, I didn't take it that way at the time.)

Any who, I hope all is well with you guys out there! Later gators!

My How a Week Makes a Difference!

This Thursday will be 5.5 months for us! Where does all the time go?? Within the last week I have grown tremendously - just look at me!

Front view

You can barely see it in this one but my veiny-ness is in full force.  If you look closely you can see my veins  big time. Kinda gross, but this isn't uncommon while pregnant and they are sticking out all over my chest area also. I kind of have a blue tint to my skin because so many are visible (but please refrain from any smurf jokes). ;)

For some reason you can't see it as much in this picture, but I feel much much bigger than I was!

Now after seeing pictures of me, wouldn't you love to see pictures of the baby??!! Well, I try to never disappoint - so, here you go! (I've taken the liberty to add captions for what I believe the baby is saying in the pictures. I also should add that these pictures make me ridiculously happy, every time I look at them I can't help but smile.)

Are you talkin' to me?

Ok, ok, I get it you're talking to me....now stop shaking me all around, it tickles!
( I swear if you compare this picture to the one above it - it appears that the baby is smiling. Just look at those pushed up cheeks!)

What? Sorry, I'm very very busy in here...there's lots of thumb sucking to be done and you can bet I'll be the one to do it!

Oh yeah, that feels good - just stretching the legs a bit here. Man, do I wish I had a little more room, this space is kind of small! 

Zzzzzzzzzz.....

I hope you all enjoy the pictures as much as we do! Later gators!

Do I know you?

The other day I went to the kitchen to get something to eat because I was hungry. I picked up a bag of pumpkin seeds and saw a chocolate treat and decided to eat that. My intention was to take the pumpkin seeds back to my desk to eat them, however in the middle of eating my chocolate treat something happened....

...I totally forgot what I was doing... I mean - totally forgot. As I stood there (still eating the chocolate and holding the bag of pumpkin seeds) I wondered 'what am I doing here in the kitchen?' As I continued to eat my chocolate I started to think 'well, I am kind of hungry'. It was at that point that I realized that I had already gone through the thought process of 'I'm hungry, I should get something to eat from the kitchen' because:

1) I was already in the kitchen

2) I was already eating a chocolate

3) I already had a bag of pumpkin seeds in my hand that I was planning on eating

Also, on several occasions I've forgotten words in the middle of sentences. One day Binderclips and I were having a conversation about something (I forget what exactly - are you surprised?). Anyways, I could not remember what you call that thing that things are shipped in, you know that's made out of cardboard, that's square....what do you call those things again? 

Unfortunately I could not remember the word and Binderclips had to say "Are you talking about a box?". "YES!" I said enthusiastically "that's exactly what I'm talking about!" I felt relieved that the descriptions I had provided had helped him figure out what I was talking about. All he could say was "Really? You really could not remember the word 'box'?"

What I'm describing above is called 'mommy brain'. Did you guys know something like this existed or happened to pregnant woman? I didn't, that is, until it happened to me. I mean I had heard of it - and you know, I thought that it may have been some weird made up thing, but it is REAL. Let me explain why*:

The brain actually shrinks during pregnancy! Now, we don't lose brain sells or anything, but the brain does restructure itself as a pregnant woman's metabolism changes. The restructuring is primarily having to do with the connections between cells and is supposed to help mothers prepare for motherhood. Interestingly, the brain begins to again increase in size 1-2 weeks before birth! Weird, right? In the end, it ends up being stronger than it was before. YAY! 

In short, babies (in utero) are head (well, brain) shrinkers!! Maybe from now on they should call it "Mommy Brain aka Shrunken Brain Syndrome"?

Any who, I hope all is well with you guys! Wait, what? Oh pictures, you mean you want to see pictures? Oh ok, but only a few as I am starting to really show and become more self conscious. Here you go!

I'm 20 weeks and a day (that's 5 months and day) today! :)

Have a great weekend everyone! Later gators!

*This is the simplified explanation, there are said to be lots of other things that contribute to "mommy brain" also, just something to remember (if you can remember anything) ;)

A Literal Sausage Fest & More Belly Pictures

Let's just cut right to the chase, shall we? I kind of suck at posting and reading other blogs since I've gotten pregnant...now, I'm not making any excuses but I have felt pretty terrible. This baby is majorly kicking my arse.

Lately, I have gotten my energy back enough to go to the gym, however when I get back I am completely exhausted. (One day we came back and I fell asleep on the couch to wake just after 8:00am [you know, when I should be starting to work?] VERY confused. I had no idea where I was or what day it was.) Also, I do still have nausea (BOOOOO) and yesterday I felt ridiculously full even though I hadn't eaten that much. My friend put it this way "You feel like you've swallowed a watermelon, right?" And, that was EXACTLY how I felt.

Since I've posted last I've had another 29th birthday (this was my 5th one - do the math and you'll figure out how old I really am), which, was not as crazy as last year's birthday but was still  interesting. I was out of town on a business trip to Atlanta, GA and had a very stressful day. By the end of the day, my feet had swelled to 2-3 times their normal size. Seriously, they were unrecognizable (I called them my Miss Piggy Feet and Ankles). One of the nurses at the hospital I was working at took my blood pressure the next day and it was slightly elevated but I think the swelling was more so due to the heat (did I mention it was 90+ degrees there?), the stress, and the fact that I didn't drink nearly as much water as I usually do. The swelling eventually came down on Friday, but I literally had to lay down the entire day to get them back to normal.

Anyways, another thing that happened was that my co-worker (and someone who I consider to be a great friend) took me to a baseball game while in Atlanta! I love going to baseball games. I don't follow baseball that much now-a-days but I LOVE going to the games. It's one of my all time favorite past times. It was such a great time! (I also have a another blog I'm working on about everything having a "lame" theme during this trip - which, was very interesting and very much not lame. Only me folks, only me.)

When I got home Binderclips surprised me with Brewer's tickets also! So, I got to go to 2 games in 1 week - YAY!! However, unlike the Brave's game - the Brewer's game was a literal sausage fest. I'm not talking men everywhere (I mean there was that also, don't get me wrong), instead there were sausages EVERYWHERE. Sausage vendors, people dressed up in sausage costumes, statues of the people dressed up in sausage costumes, and posters of sausages everywhere you turned.

Also, I'm not sure I've mentioned this, but one of my recent facebook statuses was this:

ever since I got knocked up I've taken a strong disliking to sausages (take that any way you want to folks). ;)

I cannot eat them AT ALL. They make me gag. So, Binderclips thought that the sausages being everywhere at the game was hilarious (you could not even turn around without having a sausage in your face). He later said to me "Sorry the game was such a sausage fest." And it really was. Note to everyone: if you have an aversion to sausages do not (and I mean DO NOT) go to a Brewer's game.

Alright, well I guess that's it for now! I thought I'd leave you with some updated pictures of my growing belly. Enjoy!

First the clothed ones, you can see my growing bump more at this angle

Here's the view from the side, see not as obvious as the first picture?

Here's the front view.  Notice I'm wearing my "Wood is good shirt"?  Ironic, eh? 

Same angles as the pictures above, except now you can see my belly :) I will be 19 weeks tomorrow.

 I hope everyone has a great day today. Later gators! 

Bearing the Belly: 1st Tri in a Nutshell

Let's face it folks, I kind of belong in a nutshell. Am I right, or am I right? I do nutty stuff all the time and probably would be safest in a literal nutcase. But, they don't make them large enough for me -soooo, I have to go around living in my figurative nutcase - which, we all know, I rightfully belong.

Where am I going with all of this? That's a good question, I'm not really sure myself.

What I do know is that probably not everyone wants to hear about me being pregnant, but I'm going to share some of it anyways. I, for one, was shocked when I started going through the motions of being knocked up. There are things that just need to be shared, so that others won't be as surprised as I was.

Namely, the watery mouth, the sore ta-ta's, the constant nausea, the pregnancy sciatica, my new-found assertiveness, and my overall unstable emotional condition.

This is me today, I'm 13 weeks and 5 days along. I'm definitely starting to show. Also, for the record pictures like this seem to never be flattering. Blah.

Here's the front view. Not sure I will continue to post pictures like this, but we'll see.

PS Yeah I wear my pants low, what are you going to do about it? ;)

Let's start with the fun stuff, shall we?

Sore Ta-Ta's


This started back before we even went on our cruise, so in other words - not even a month into the pregnancy. I noticed that there was an overall soreness that I just couldn't explain. I mean, usually (and other woman know this) they get sore around that time of the month, but they were ridiculously sore this time.

They were so sore, in fact, that on one of the trips that Binderclips and I took I realized how serious it was:

We were at the Enterprise Rental Car counter. Binderclips was talking to the guy behind the counter about our reservation as I waited. While waiting I got kind of bored, so I decided to try to be more involved in their conversation. As I leaned forward my ta-ta's came in direct contact with the counter. Immediately I repelled away from the counter as if we were 2 positively charged magnets. Then my lip started to quiver - that's right I was holding back tears people, it hurt that bad. Binderclips stopped talking to the guy for a minute and looked at me, I think he could tell I was going to start crying. He said "Everything ok?" to me and all I could do was say "I don't want to talk about it" while holding my tears back and holding my chest like it was a safe. From that point on I have guarded my ta-ta's like they are a national treasure.

Watery Mouth

As I write this I'm experiencing a case of this, just so you know. This also started back before we went on our cruise. I started to notice that my mouth was watering constantly and especially if I was hungry and smelled some good food nearby. I kept telling Binderclips "My mouth will not stop watering, it's like a rainforest up in there." And, it was. You know how the rain forest is an ecosystem? Well, so is my mouth - but, it's an ecosystem for bacteria apparently. That's why soo many pregnant woman experience gum issues during pregnancy. The watery mouth causes excess bacteria to develop along the gum line, many times causing gingivitis. TMI? Probably, but this watery mouth issue also contributes (at least it did for me) to the constant nausea - which, I will get to next.

Constant Nausea

Whoever decided to call it morning sickness was a jackhole. Calling it morning sickness is like calling road kill that's been sitting in the sun for 8 hours a delicatessen....grossly misleading (in several ways, if you get my drift). It should be called Constant Nausea (I mean why not call a spade a spade?), because that's what it was for me. Was I nauseous in the morning? Yes. But, I was also nauseous in the afternoon, at night, and the entire time in between. Did I throw up? Yes. Interestingly, I only threw up select things that I ate though. One morning, while travelling I had a chicken biscuit, some hash browns, and an orange juice for breakfast. Apparently the baby no-likey orange juice because that's all that came back up.

The point is, for some, the nausea is constant. I was so nauseous that every time I went to the doctor I lost weight (which is not uncommon). This leads to the last item I'll discuss for today - my overall unstable emotional condition.

Overall Unstable Emotional Condition

I'm going to call this OUEC for short. The very last time I went to the doctor was on 4/4. Binderclips gave me a virus of some sort and I was feeling awful, so the doctor wanted to see me. The first thing they do when you get to my doctor's office is weigh you. Well, since I had been sick for a week my weight loss hit an all time low. I got on the scale to notice that I had lost 5-6 pounds total over the course of the 1st trimester. On my previous visit just a week before, I had lost 4 pounds total. Additionally, the day I got sick (consequently a week before the 4/4 appointment, in the evening and AFTER I had seen my doctor during the day) I was running a 102 degree temperature. 

I read in all my books that you do not want to let your temperature get over 102 because it can be harmful to the baby. The night I had the fever I called my doctor and she told me to take tylenol and drink lots of water - that I would be ok.

So, when I arrived at the doctor and had lost even more weight and I had such a high fever the week before and was hormonally imbalanced to boot - I was an emotional wreck. The nurse made the mistake of telling me "We'll listen to the heartbeat with the Doppler also while you're here." But what I heard was "We'll listen to the baby's heartbeat to make sure you haven't killed it with your weight loss and high fever..."

As soon as she left me alone in the exam room I started crying. When she came back in I was still crying. All I could say to her was "I'm sorry. I'm an emotional wreck, I was fine before I got here" while continuing to cry.  Even after we heard the baby's heartbeat I still continued to cry. I found out that not only did I have a virus, but I also had a sinus infection AND pink eye. As soon as I got out to the car I called Binderclips - sobbing. "What happened?!" he exclaimed. "Everything's fine. They did a Doppler and I heard the heartbeat, so I didn't kill the baby" I said then continued to sob. I eventually let him go because I just couldn't bare to talk about it any longer (I'm certain he thought I had officially lost it at this point). 

I could not stop crying and I had no idea why. Actually, I think the mere thought of me having accidentally killed our unborn child was overwhelming and I just could not get myself back together. I even cried the entire way home from the doctor's office.

Maybe I'll talk about the other items later...I really don't want to bore people with all this pregnancy stuff, but I do want to share how I'm feeling with you guys along the way.

Have a great day everyone! Later gators!

I Might Be Growing a Penis...

....or an extra vagina. At this point we're really not sure what it is, honestly. So, I have a growth, you see. Wait, maybe I should back up a little bit here...

You know when I went on that cruise back in February? Well, while I shared a very embarrassing story where 4 people embarrassed themselves at once, I kind of left out something else that happened. I think I shared that on the second day of the cruise we stopped in Freeport and went snorkeling and kayaking, didn't I? Well, if I didn't tell you before, I'm telling you now. The couple we went with and I had a great time doing these things, but Binderclips - not so much. He kind of hates water, so much so that when he gets into it, his main goal is to get out of it ASAP. Needless to say, he did not snorkel for very long (maybe 2 minutes max) and the picture of us kayaking is the only time he stopped paddling, otherwise he was full speed ahead in making it to land.

While snorkeling my foot touched some of the poisonous coral and that's where the growth came from. Errr, I mean, that's not right either. I think this growth is giving me memory loss...

So, where was I? Oh yeah, the second day we went to Nassau and went on a Pirates of Nassau and Historical Tour where I was attacked by a Pirate. No joke, check out the picture below.

On the third day, the cruise ship travelled back to Port Canaveral and so we were at sea all day. So, what did we decide to do? Spend the entire day in the hot tub or lounging in the sun, that's what! In doing so, we ran into the couple we had been having our formal dinner with every night...you know, the one we all embarrassed ourselves in front of on the first night? By the end of the cruise we had made great friends with them. They decided to hang out with us, which was awesome because they were a blast to hang out with.

Anyways, they decided to share some exciting news with us...they had went to take a pregnancy test in the Medical Center on the cruise ship and they were expecting!!!!! She went onto describe that the lady in the Medical Center had given her the test that was clearly positive because it had 2 lines on it.

We were all sooo excited for them but I began to think to myself 'My Aunt Dot is late, maybe I should just go take a test...' but (and this is a big BUT) I'm always late - I mean ALWAYS. At this point I was a week late, in the past I had been up to 10-15 days late. Also, I cannot even tell you how many pregnancy tests I had taken up to this point. Because I have endometriosis it's not uncommon for Aunt Dot to be late. Additionally, Binderclips and I were told that we could not conceive on our own - in fact, we had tried fertility drugs with no success. Our next step was to either do IUI or IVF per our doctor (I had already taken the class to learn how to give myself shots and everything).

So I ask Nancy "Will you go down to the Medical Center with me?" I continue by saying "It's going to be negative, it's ALWAYS negative." When she said yes we decided to head on down for a quick test.

So, I peed in a cup and we waited. Then finally the lady came out and showed me the test. She leaned over the counter and while holding it in paper towel like it was a baby bird or something, I looked over at it.

To my surprise, there were 2 lines. In my head I said 'there are 2 lines', well at least I thought I said it in my head, until the lady looked at me and said "Yep, there are 2 lines." In shock I said "That means positive" frantically to her...at this point, Nancy pointed out to me later that the lady was looking at me trying to figure out if it being positive was good or bad...She responded with "Yes" in a scared type of tone. That's when I lost it, I mean I lost it people, I started crying hysterically and so did Nancy.

After explaining that the hubs and I were told we couldn't conceive on our own and we had been trying for about a year at that point, she started crying too. We honestly thought we wouldn't be able to do it on our own, so you can imagine how surprised I was.

So, you see, I do kind of have a growth and it could have either a penis or a vagina. We'll find out around 20 weeks what we're having. We are very excited and I couldn't help but share this story with you all. Hopefully you guys can cut me some slack from not posting that much, I have been really sick. Whoever decided to call it morning sickness is an evil person....morning sickness many times lasts all day/night and it has for me. In fact, I've lost some weight during the 1st trimester, but they say it isn't that uncommon and that I'll start to put on weight soon enough. Baby Binderbuns (as my friend likes to call it) is set to arrive on (or around) October 20!

Any who, I hope this story brightens your day, it sure brightened ours! Later gators!

Fruity...

...awards are the best and so very fitting for me (since I'm a little fruity at times), don't ya think? 

TB over at Year 31 has given me the Cherry on Top Award! YAY! Thank you so much, TB!

To accept this award, here's what I must do:

1.  List three things that I love about myself

2.  Share a picture of me, and

3.  Nominate five other blogs for this award.

Seems easy enough!

Three things I love about myself:

1) I have no problem laughing at myself. I mean, let's face it, I do a lot of stupid stuff that results in me embarrassing myself....if you have this quality, I think it should be a requirement that you know how to laugh at yourself. Don't get me wrong, I haven't always been able to laugh at myself. For a long time there I took things waaaay to seriously. But, I've learned that fully experiencing a situation with an open mind and heart is much better than closing myself off because I've embarrassed myself AND I end up having A LOT more fun that way too!

2) I'm VERY easily amused. It's definitely not hard to make me laugh and I tend to have a good time no matter what I'm doing.

3) I try to practice self caring rather than selfishness - always. Most of the last 10 years of my life have been centered around me trying not to be selfish. Strange? Maybe. The reasoning for it was that I was fortunate enough to be surrounded by some very selfish people growing up. I say "fortunate" because I learned a great deal from these people, unfortunately most of it was how I didn't want to be, but I still learned a lot from them. However, in trying to be soo different and not be selfish at all I, many times, forgot to consider myself. That's where self caring comes into the picture. It allows me to consider others, however, not at my own expense. I've just recently adopted this perspective and I'm a much happier person because of it!

Here's a recent picture of me:

What?! I was just helping the man with his rod. Geesh!

Bloggers I'm passing this award onto:


Bernie at One Mixed Bag
Climb2nowhere at Climb 2 Nowhere
Gina Dollface at Georgina Dollface
Missed Periods at Missed Periods and Other Grammar Scares
Vince at Reeds

Later gators! I hope you have a great day today!

Have you ever...

Who doesn't love monkeys? 

1. Threatened to swallow that little piece of a cell phone that fits into the battery charger outlet (you know, when the phone isn't being charged) because someone (read: Binderclips) was neurotic about putting it back in his phone when it was done charging?
2. Tripped over a cord during a meeting at work (where 30+ are attending) to catch yourself prior to falling, but have your hair (that you straightened meticulously) draped over your face so you look like Cousin It?
3. Blasted "Star Wars Gangsta Rap" (at the highest volume) in a university computer lab on accident because what you thought was the headphone outlet was not?
4. Met a girl... ok, so I really hope that song is in your head now because it's totally in mine. Sorry I had to do it with "Have you ever.." as the blog's title. I'm sure you understand.
5. Decided that the guy who asked you out that had a girlfriend (I found out after he asked me out on a date and I accepted) needed to learn a lesson? So, you showed up at his house at the time of the date WITH his girlfriend and when he answered the door said "I think you guys have some stuff to talk about" then left?
6. Tried to convince anyone that "sneakily" and "apedness" are real words?
7. Lost your entire desk?

No? So I guess it's just me?

I have plenty more where these came from (which, I'm sure you all are aware of), however these are just the ones that came to mind this morning.

Probably my favorite of all of these is #1. The look on Binderclips' face when I picked the piece up and threatened to swallow it was priceless. Plus, I wish I would've had a tape recorder because the argument that ensued was hilarious. It went a little something like this:

Hulabuns: "What's this?" I say as I pick up the tiny piece of the phone deviously

Binderclips: "You know what it is" he says suspiciously

Hulabuns: "You don't NEED it do you?" I say while glaring at him

Binderclips: "Yes, actually I do" he says  glaring back at me and reaching for it

Hulabuns: In that moment I realize just neurotic he is about this thing. I look at the tiny piece of phone and think 'If I ate this it would totally not hurt me', then look back at him (he's still glaring at me).  "You know, I'm kind of hungry...." I say.

Binderclips: "I have some food in the kitchen...want to put that down and go into the kitchen?" he says frantically and still reaching for it

Hulabuns: "Nah, I think I might just snack on this" I say evilly

Binderclips: "You wont' really eat it" he says, then follows it up with a worried "Will you?!"

Hulabuns: "Yep" I say as I start to dangle the piece over my mouth

Binderclips: "What is wrong with you??!!" he exclaims as he and I start wrestling over the piece (I continue to dangle it over my mouth every chance I get)

After about 2 or so minutes of wrestling and dangling the piece over my mouth I finally just stop. I look at Binderclips and he looks defeated and confused. I decide I've put the guy through enough for now, however now I know how to really get to him. The piece of the phone mysteriously disappears for the rest of the night...We don't talk about the incident again until just a couple of days ago when Binderclips found the piece of the phone. He kept it in our memories box. He pointed it out and we both started laughing hysterically.

You ever do anything like that? If so, I'd love to hear about it! Have a great weekend everyone! Later gators.

Cruisin' & Confusin'

How IS everyone out there? I've really missed you guys!! I cannot wait to get all caught up on your blogs!

Since we got home from the cruise I haven't felt that well, that's why I haven't posted. I'm still feeling a bit under the weather, however I'm hoping I'll start to feel better soon. Anyways, something happened on the cruise that I MUST share with you guys. I'm sure you noticed the title to this blog: "Cruisin' & Confusin'"....well, that is exactly what we did, like it was our j. o. b. This is how it happened:

First I should mention that Binderclips and I took this cruise with another couple who are some of our best friends - Nancy and Kurt. Any who, on the very first day of the cruise we all decided to do some much needed "hot-tubbing". So, we headed to the adult deck and found a hot tub that had some people in it, but not many, so decided to hop in.

Little did we know that there was a reason there weren't many people in the hot tub - one of the guys in it was pretty intoxicated. He was sharing his name, his room and other personal information with all of us and that's when we decided he was not going to know who we were or what rooms we were in. So, we made sure not to mention any of our information to him. Eventually, it was time for dinner (we were scheduled to attend the formal dinner every night at 8:15), so we all got out and left the man in the hot tub.

After all of us got ready for dinner we started walking up to the formal dinner deck. On our way we decided that if there was anyone else at our table, we'd use fake names, just in case they were crazy like the guy in the hot tub earlier. We decided that Binderclips was going to be Allen, I was going to be Sandy, and our friends were going to be Kara (aka Nancy*) and Kirk (aka Kurt*).

When we got to our table there was another couple sitting at it already. I thought 'Fake names coming at ya' to myself about what was about to go down. We sat down, the couple introduced themselves to us and that's when we decided to introduce ourselves...We should've known it was going to go downhill from there because of how it started out:

Nancy (who was going by the name of Kara) decided to introduce us all, however when she got to me we looked at each other for a brief moment then simultaneously looked at the couple and said:

"This is Crista" and the same time I started to say "I'm Sa..." The couple across the table looked at us in confusion for a moment, however Nancy continued on and introduced Allen (aka Binderclips) to them and that snapped them out of her confusion momentarily.

Not too long after that I noticed Nancy giving me funny looks. I had no clue why though, I tried to mouth to her "Is there something in my teeth?" but she just shook her head at me. Finally, Kurt leaned over to me and whispered "we all keep using our real names an accident". 'That must be why the lady across the table also kept giving me funny and confused looks' I thought. 'We can turn this around, we just have to use the fake names from here on out' I thought, then told Binderclips what was happening to remind him to use the fake names instead of our real names.

Immediately after that, the waiter came up to our table and asked Binderclips "Are you Mr. Binderclips?**"

The couple looks at us, obviously confused.
We look at them thinking '$hit, $hit, $hit! Now our cover is really blown!'

Because he has no other choice - Binderclips responds with "yes" in a somewhat defeated tone.
The couple looks at us even more confused than ever.

The waiter proceeds to wish Binderclips and I a "Happy Anniversary!" (It totally was NOT our anniversary.)
Confused, we look at Nancy and Kurt wondering if they did this.
Nancy and Kurt look at us with confused looks on their faces thinking 'Crap, we missed their anniversary!' Then, 'Wait, it's not their anniversary!'
The couple across the table continue to stare at us with confused looks on their faces.
We all sit genuinely confused, just looking at each other as the waiter brings cake for Binderclips and I. We look at Kurt and Nancy, they look at us, and the couple across the table continues looking at all of us with, what is becoming a very familiar confused look on their faces.

After the waiter left we explained that the names we gave them were not our real names and proceeded to tell them why we gave them fake names. Thank goodness the couple had a great sense of humor and found it funny also. We actually made friends with the couple and hung out with them during the cruise.

Anyways, the lesson is that you should never lie (well unless it's absolutely necessary, like you are about to die or something). I hope you all are doing well out there. Have a great day!

*The real names that I list are also fake names. You might be asking yourself "COULD Hulabuns be anymore confusing?" I assure you, the answer is "yes". As a side note I should also mention that the fake names thing kind of originated from me calling one of Binderclips' friends by the wrong name when we first met. After that, his friends decided to come up with alternate/fake names for everyone as to confuse me even more.

**He didn't actually say "Mr. Binderclips" he actually used his real name, just FYI.