Friday, April 30, 2010

WOE!?!?

So, I was perusing through old photo's in a folder titled "HulaBuns to Sort" and came across this gem. So, naturally I thought I'd share it.

My question to you - What on Earth do you think the reasoning behind this was?

Yes, I did create it (hard to believe, I know). I have a guess and will give an explanation, however really want to know what you think.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Stealthy Ninjaness

Regularly, Binderclips and I argue (playfully, not real arguing) about who is more ninja-ish (ok, so I claim to be a ninja and he claims to know Kung Fu). To answer your first question of whether either of us is trained in the martial arts, that answer would be a big fat no. We both understand this, however I have to believe I have a ninja inside just waiting to come out (if ever necessary).

I also want to add that I do have a tendency to argue with Binderclips over things that are, well, for lack of a better word - fapalack. In fact, on many occassion I have claimed to be having a "tall day" - I'm 5'4" and he's 6', so that doesn't ever go over well either.

Anyways, usually our conversations about this topic go like this:

Me: "Can I ask you a question?" I say, as we are doing our grocery shopping

Him: Sure, what's up?

Me: Do I intimidate you with my stealthy ninjaness sometimes?

Him: Well that depends, are you intimidated by my known knowledge of Kung Fu?

Me: "No, and let me tell you why - you don't know Kung Fu. So, let's get back to the more pressing part of this conversation, the part about you being intimidated by my stealthy ninjaness. It's ok to feel intimidated, I imagine a lot of people are intimidated by ninjas and their ninjaness." I say, again as we are grocery shopping. At this point we are at the meat counter and other people are standing around waiting also, btw.

Him: He glares at me and says  "Nothing about you is stealthy"

Me:  I'm sure you meant to say "everything" instead of "nothing"

Him: Don't make me go all Kung Fu on you right here in the store

Me: "Try it and you'll get one quick, swift karate chop to the neck" I say

It's at this point that we walk up to the check out lane to have the cashier give us both a strange look. We both glare at each other for a moment with a kind of 'until-we-meet-again' look, then look back at the cashier and both give her a friendly smile.

I think 'this round goes to HulaBuns', while I'm certain he's thinking 'chalk this up to another round for Binderclips'. We decide not to continue the conversation until later when he throws and hits me with what I like to call the dogs' "dead animal toy" in the face. More on that later, however I'd like to leave you with this picture as a parting gift for now:

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Make Up Words Wednesdays (MUWW)

I've decided that me and my friends make up words enough to have an entire day of the week dedicated to it. However, I want your input - do you make up words? If so, sign me up to hear what they are and how you define them! I also plan on making the words "word of the days" that I will challenge myself (and you, if you're interested) to use as much as possible (disclaimer: people will call you out on using made up words, be strong and confident when using any MUWs and as always use them with caution).

My word of the day today is fapalack (pronounced; fap- a- lack). It means preposterous, ridiculous, or absurd. Used in a sentence:

That shit is wack, in fact, it's fapalack.

If there's interest, I will keep a running list of all the words created (by you and me) on an additional page on the blog. Looking forward to hearing your MUWs, nothing's better than throwing a new word in the mix on hump day!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

I See Alive People

This one goes back to my 'working in an office days', you know, when I used to work with real people (in person) and not just talk to people (who look how I think they do and not how they actually do) over the phone. If you have ever had conversations with someone you are doing work for or with (that you have never met in person), you know what I mean. The picture you have in your head is almost always not what the person looks like at all.

One perfect example was when I first excepted the position I am in now a couple years ago. I had to do a lot of work with this one man over the phone, who, incidentally, sounded like he was in his 60's, walked with a cane, and was 4 feet tall - let's call him Walter.

A couple of months after having started working with Walter, he and a bunch of folks from the project came to my area. They decided to go out to dinner one of the nights and invite me, so I went. Thank goodness I had met 1 of the 20 people in the group in person previously, otherwise I wouldn't have known who anyone was.

Anyways, I showed up, saw the lady I knew and said hello. She started introducing me to everyone and as she was doing this I was looking around for the short, elderly man I knew as Walter. To my surprise, I couldn't find him anywhere. Then, all of a sudden I was standing next to a giant (I mean like a NBA-basketball-tall-kind-of-giant). A giant who was not old, in fact, he seemed to be in his early 50's maybe late 40's. Even more surprising was that the giant was Walter. 'What on Earth!?' I thought and 'Man, I am terrible at this game.' Nowadays I'm on the phone with people so much for work (that I may never meet in person) that we sometimes send pictures of ourselves to each other.

Anyways, to get back to the original story. One day I was working in my cube, I had lots of cube mates and many who I didn't even know what their names were. So, I was working in a cubicle that looked a lot like this:
I was sitting and working on the inside corner when I saw a guy that I didn't know (in my peripheral vision) walk past the cubicle. I continued to work until I saw him pass by again going in the opposite direction. Then, for some reason, he stopped. I turned around to see him standing there, just looking at me. I'm looking at him, he's looking at me, I'm looking at him, he's looking at me - this continued for at least 5-10 seconds, you get the idea (basically we were just staring at each other).

Then, all of a sudden he decided to say something. My response, of course, was to scream "AHHHHHH!" It was like he was a statue that shouldn't be able to speak or something, that kind of scream. After I gained my composure back I started to laugh and said "I'm soo sorry, I'm not sure why I screamed. I knew you were standing there, I was looking right at you." He started to laugh also and every time I saw him after that in the office we both just laughed, for years and still to this day, if I see him we both laugh.

What is wrong with me!? Clearly, Binderclips and I have had this happen too many times.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Poop Eater

So, now that you've been introduced to Callie and Turner in The Armpit Incident post I can start sharing some of the crazy stuff that they do (and make me do). Starting with Callie liking to eat bunny poop while outside.
The picture below is a picture of what the bunny poop looks like and can be found on this blog with additional information about bunny poop and other topics, if you want to check it out.

On the day in question, I took Callie and Turner outside to find myself talking to them (as usual), this is how the conversation went:

Me: "Callie! Stop eating the rabbit poop, for god sakes!!" as she eats an entire pile of it and starts to search out additional piles to munch on.

Callie: Yes, I am aware that dogs don't talk, but if she could I'm sure she would have been saying "But Mom!! It  tastes so yummy and it looks just like the vitamin bits in my food!! Mmmmmmm!!" This is what the actual vitamin bits look like, they're actually called Lifesource bits.

It's at this point that I think 'If only Callie was a vitamin bit discriminator like Turner' since he will eat everything but the vitamin bits in the food (and only after he's carried mouthfuls of it over to the rug in the kitchen and left a danger-zone of vitamin bits all over it).

Me: "Ick!!! Stop it right now! Nobody likes a poop eater, nobody!!"

Callie: Looks at me with sad puppy dog eyes "But Mom!" I also swear I heard her sniffle a little bit.

Me: "Big fat NO on that one Callie. No more eating bunny poop! I don't care how cute you are! No one likes a poop eater, no one!!" Just as I say it I that I realize that I can think of one person who WOULD like a poop eater - Me (as long as it was a Callie and Turner poop eater and was NOT named Callie or Turner). Before I know it, I've said this out loud and just in time for the maintenance guy to walk up and hear me. Crap....sigh.

After having a brief conversation with the maintenance guy and trying to explain (awkwardly, might I add) why I was talking about poop and poop eaters with the dogs, I go back inside.

When Binderclips gets home I tell him about it, he's not surprised by any of it (the part where I was talking to the dogs and the maintenance guy overheard me seems to be the least surprising part to him, go figure). He agrees that we could use a poop eater that would eat Turner and Callie's poop (that, again, was not named Callie or Turner).

Later that night we decided to go out to a local restaurant The Blue Moose. As soon as we walk in we give them a name and wait patiently by the specials sign. We're standing there a couple of minutes before Binderclips points at the specials sign and says "Poop eater".

I look at it and see that tilapia is on special. Ever since we caught the Dirty Jobs episode where Mike Rowe goes to a Fish Farm and learns that the primary function of the tilapia is to eat all the other fish that are being farmed's poop, we don't eat it anymore....If only I could find a school of tilapia to swim around in the backyard, then all of my poop problems would be solved. ;)

Thursday, April 22, 2010

The Armpit Incident

I'm not sure why most of the dysfunctional communication between Binderclips and myself occurs at night, all I know is - it does and both of us have to live with it.

One night about 2 months ago we were going to bed. Both of us climbed in; me on the right and him on the left, as usual. Although before I get into what happened I should first mention that we have 2 wonderful dogs: Turner (a boy) and Callie (a girl). Both are from the same litter, a litter of chihuahua/terrier pups that were born on 12/17/09.

Here's a pic of the little monsters (Turner has the white stripe and Callie doesn't):
















Aren't they the cutest dogs EVER??!!?! Before you start getting all detaily* on me, let me say this: "Yes, Turner IS, in fact, wearing a doggie diaper....and YES, it WAS necessary. He had a bit of a incontinence issue up until the age of 10-11 months old."

As I was saying, we were climbing into bed for the night. Callie had crawled under the sheets in between Binderclips and I with her tail near my shoulder and her head near my hip. Immediately after that Binderclips turned off the light. Because we have dark curtains (due to the fact I am a very light sleeper), it was pitch black in our room.

I was feeling nice so I decided to reach over and give Binderclips a pat/rub on the shoulder to say goodnight. So I reached over (again in the pitch blackedness**) to feel for Binderclips' shoulder, however felt something furry. Thinking it was Callie's tail I tried to push it to the side repeatedly (think a 'stay' in cards type hand motion). After about the 5th or 6th try I got frustrated and said "What on Earth??!!" (this is a phrase I throw around a lot so get used to it). To which Binderclips responded with "What are you doing?!" In which I responded with "What is THAT?!" To which he responded with "My armpit." To which both of us burst out in a fit of laughter.

When I asked him why he didn't say anything to me when I was "petting his armpit" (because that IS what I was doing basically) he said he thought it was the dog. Now, when we go to bed, before he shuts off the light (and sometimes after), he'll ask me if I want to pet his armpit.

*Detaily means focusing on the details
**Blackedness IS a word (in my book) and if it's not, it should be and I refuse to define it because the definition should be obvious

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Abandoned by Astronauts

Remember how I mentioned that the Snaz fish incident was before we realized what happens to me when I get hot while sleeping? If you have not yet read the Snaz fish story I recommend you do.Well, the answer to that question is - I have nightmares, terrifying and unbearable, nightmares.

So, on this particular night we had went to bed fairly early - subsequently, leaving lots of time for reoccurring dreams (or nightmares). Anyways, the last nightmare (even if it's a reoccurring one) is the one that always makes the biggest impact (for me, at least).

In the nightmare I was on a shuttle that landed on the moon and for some reason was the chosen one to have to go outside of the shuttle and put a box on the moon (maybe I work for Alien FedEx perhaps?). I believe this was the main reason for the mission (it's always called a mission when you go to another planet or moon, right?). The nightmare always seems to start off in the same place - with me climbing down a ladder outside of the shuttle with the box in question in my astronaut hands (don't ask me how I was holding onto it with those gigantic gloves on). All I have to do is place the box on the moon's surface (which, appears to have no one on it, so I'm not sure who the heck is receiving the box), then get back into the shuttle so we can head back to Earth (BTW, now that I think about it, I'm certain this has something to do with Buzz Aldrin being on this season's DWTS).

For some reason, as I climb down the ladder - I'm terrified. Instead of stepping off the ladder at all, I just place the box on the ground as quickly as I can, then start to feverishly climb up the ladder to get back into the shuttle.This is where things get interesting - the shuttle starts to take off with me still on the ladder. I scream, yell, and pound on the shuttle as I realize it's doing this. This is my view from the shuttle, by the way (which, gives me the creeps because it's so reminiscent of the nightmare view).

Next thing I know, the shuttle blasts off with me still on the ladder - somehow, I'm able to hold on as we zoom through space and back to Earth. However, I'm freezing and again, terrified that I'll fall off at any moment. Then I wake up freaked out beyond belief.


The thing that I started to think about though was 'if I was an astronaut why would I be afraid of getting out and putting a package on the moon?' Well, I think I figured out the answer (remember this was a reoccurring nightmare): I believe the first time I got out of the shuttle (and had this nightmare) I was not terrified at all to climb down the ladder and set the box on the moon. Instead I merrily climbed down thinking 'I'm on the moon!!!!' (think "I'm on a boat!" excited - except without all the swearing). So, instead of feverishly climbing back up the ladder after setting the box down I believe I hopped off the ladder and lallygagged around for a bit. To which, the other astronaut FedExers got impatient and tried to take off without me.

My guess is that as the nightmare reoccurred again and again I spent less and less time on the moon and was more and more careful about not being left on the moon, which would explain why I was so terrified the last time I had the nightmare.

After this Binderclips told me I was "not allowed to watch anything astronomy or space related before bed" (what am I, 5?!). Anywho, if you want to see some awesome views check out Soichi Noguchi's twitter account - he just returned to Earth about a day ago from being on board the space station since last December. While in space he made several tweets that included pictures of Earth. Pretty cool stuff if you ask me (although, I shouldn't be allowed to look at them, since they will most likely give me nightmares - I hate when Binderclips is right).

Here's a recent Soichi tweet pic:

I bet Soichi wouldn't abandon me on the moon.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Pirate-aid

Let me preface this story with this tidbit of information: I really enjoy getting Binderclips to talk to me over the phone about embarrassing things while he's at work (and in front of co-workers that have never met me). On this particular day I called him and this is what went down:

Me: As soon as he answers the phone I say "The pirate band-aid is a no go"
Him: What?!
Me: I tried the pirate band-aid on my toe and it's too sticky-ish
Him: Did you say pirate?
Me: Yes, I tried to replace my band-aid with the pirate one and it's too sticky-ish
Him: "Sticky-ish is not a word and please tell me that we have other band-aids aside from pirate ones?" he sounds like he's trying to be a little quiet so that no one at work hears him talking about pirates and saying things like "sticky-ish"
Me: No (refusing to tell him that we do, in fact, have other types of band-aids - he didn't say "do we have other types of band-aids?" he said "please tell me that we have other band-aids aside from pirate ones?" - I'm just refusing to tell him that we do)
Him: I swore that we had some duct tape ones in there, are you sure?
Me: Thinking 'Hmmm, forgot about the duct tape ones' (we DO actually have these also). I respond with  "I strongly dislike them, therefore they are not at option" (when at all possible I try to answer questions with responses that mimic the Likert Scale (i.e. strongly disagree, disagree, neither disagree or agree, agree, strongly agree) except for I change "disagree" to "like" or "dislike")
Him: "So, you're telling me that you would like to go to the doctor's this week for your follow-up appointment with a pirate band-aid on?" again, he's talking quietly - however, this time he sounds irritated
Me: Well, they do have a skull and crossbones on them....maybe it would make me seem threatening? Like, "hurt me toe again and you'll be walkin the plank! ARRRGGHH!"
Him: Walking the plank!? Really?! I can't believe I'm having this conversation.
Me: I start to laugh. Whenever I can get him to say "I can't believe I'm having this conversation" I win (in my mind)
Him: "I gotta go" he says in a defeated voice

I also believe that if I had a nickel for every time he said "I can't believe I'm having this conversation" to me I would be rich, just an FYI. :) In case there was any question as to if I really have pirate band-aids, see below:



Sunday, April 18, 2010

Goin' Gangsta - the surgery continued

This is a continuation of the following blog postings:


1) Funky*
2) Bunches*
3) Of*
4) Goats*

*blog posting names are listed differently above for protection purposes only (Who am I kidding? I listed them differently because I can and wanted to - so there!)

Last time I left off with the doctor coming in to start the surgery....So here we go:

He came in, sat down and started cleaning my toe immediately. While I may have seemed calm I was freaking out on the inside. As he cleaned it I thought about just getting up and saying "You know, I forgot about something very important I had to do...mumble mumble mumble" then running out full speed (most likely running into an door or wall on the way out, since a smooth escape is most definitely not my style).

Instead, I decided to awkwardly talk about random things. I remember saying something about being one of the subjects in my thesis study and explaining "when the biopsy needle goes through the fascia it makes a loud POP noise" - I have no idea why I thought this was a good time to talk about that. I also remember having thoughts about an astronaut pushing around a shopping cart around on the moon (a nightmare I had the night before), I really hope I didn't say anything about that.

I was sitting on a normal examination bed, however it had been adjusted so that you couldn't lay down but instead were sitting up - in this case, watching what was going on. After sitting there and watching him give me a shot of lidocaine I decided watching him cut into my toe and then file off bone in 2 different locations, was NOT an option...GAG. Also, prior to going I decided not to eat anything because I really felt like I would throw up if I did.

After asking (again awkwardly) if I could lay down instead of watch "Ummm, yeah, how does this thing work?" I say (referring to the examination bed). "What thing?" he says in a confused tone. "Oh, a, the bed thingy I'm on" (clearly my brain stopped functioning at that point) "I'd like to not watch... errr, um, lay down if I can." After giving me a brief, strange look he laid the bed back, but not all the way. After I noticed I was not going to be laying all the way down (and still able to see what was going on), I asked him to hand me a book I brought to read (or in this case, use as a shield as to not see what was going on). He did (first he looked at his hands with surgical gloves on them, with his surgical mask on, as if to say "Really?! You really want me to hand it to you NOW?"). 'What on Earth!!?? This guy is SICK. He's trying to make me throw up, I just know it!' I thought. I contemplated yelling "YOU'RE SICK MAN!!" at him, but decided against it as I didn't want to rattle his nerves right before the surgery.

Finally, he asked if I could feel anything he was doing. "No" I said suspiciously. 'WAIT! Couldn't we just remove the toe? I don't need it and have always found pirates and peg legs fascinating. I could have a peg leg!' I thought as I freaked out inside my head (imagining myself wearing a patch, a peg leg and a hook and saying "ARRRRGHH").

After he cut into the toe (I knew he had because I had peered around the book for a brief moment to see blood coming out of the it), he started filing.... GAG GAG GAG (insert 5 million "GAG"s here). The filing required him to manipulate my toe in such a way that my foot was basically being jerked all around while he tried to find just the right angle to file the additional bone off (again, in 2 different locations, shown above). This went on for probably 5 minutes, then when he was done he stitched it up and I was ready to walk out (thanks to the lidocaine)....not knowing that the days after would be soo incredibly painful  that I would not be able to walk for 4-5 DAYS (insert a bunch of profanities here).


Just so you know, it's been a little over 2 weeks and I still have a slight limp.....GRRRR

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Scaretastic

On occassion I like to scare Binderclips for no other reason than - just for the fun of it (and often this happens on accident).

Anywho, one day he was in the shower and I had to tell him something (this is an 'on accident' example btw). I went into the bathroom, not trying to be quiet or anything, in fact I thought my entrance was a loud one. Anyways, I peered around the shower curtain to see the back of him, so I decided to wait until he turned around before I said anything so that I wouldn't scare him. To my surprise, the opposite happened. As soon as he turned around and saw me he screamed "AHHHHHHHHH!". Because I didn't expect him to scream like a girl (and at all for that matter) and because he scared me by yelling at me I screamed back "AHHHHHHH!!". To which I scared him again and he screamed at me again "AHHHHHHH!!!".

Finally, I had to yell "CUT IT OUT!" for us both to snap out of it. The funny thing is that this has happened SEVERAL times in our household and it always seem to play out the same way.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

The Snaz fish not to be confused with the snazzy fish

This is also an oldie but goodie. I'll get back to the "Goin' Gangsta" stuff tomorrow - I had stitches removed today...gag... and the whole ordeal makes me nauseous...gag....to even think about right now...gag.

This one goes back a couple of years. One night Binderclips and I were sleeping and I was sleeping with my head on his shoulder (this was before we realized what happens to me when I get hot while sleeping, more on that later). So, he was on his back and I was all snuggled up on my side laying towards him with my head on his shoulder, near his ear.

Anyways, I was having a dream that basically was me watching a documentary on predatory animals. It started with the black bear and how it "cautiously sneaks up on elk and moose" (said in a documentary type voice - think Alec Baldwin-ish (but not the yelling at his daughter Alec, more like 30 Rock Alec)). It went on to describe how "the black bear only hunts salmon at night as it's dark fur is easily seen during the day". I found this to be gripping and could not stop watching such a fascinating documentary.

Next came the Snaz fish, in which "sneaks up on it's prey, then, without warning, eats the prey whole in one gulp!" 'HOLY SHIT!' I thought, 'it looks like such a harmless fish'. I was obviously not expecting it to eat the nice little fishy it was following (think Finding Nemo with Dory following around Marlin type deal) whole - in an instant. 'And I thought they were friends!' I thought, devastated.

Then, all of a sudden, I was dropped into the water to compete with the Snaz fish. "Swim quick and keep chomping" said the documentary type voice "you must catch the prey before the Snaz fish does." So, what did I do? I FREAKING STARTING SWIMMING AND CHOMPING SCARED FOR MY LIFE!! I was chomping and swimming and swimming and chomping and just could not catch the darn prey AND THE SNAZ FISH WAS QUICKLY APPROACHING!! I just tried to swim faster and chomp harder!!

Next thing I know I'm looking at Binderclips who's looking at me with a terrified look on his face. I'm awake. 'Crap, guess I lost that competition' I think. He says (in a terrified voice) "What are you doing??!!". I respond with "Oh, I was just having some dream about a documentary in which I was in a competition with the Snaz fish. I had to eat the prey before it did, you know that kind of stuff" (thinking he must have just woken up from a terrifying nightmare himself). I follow it up with "Are you ok? Must have been some nightmare you were having, you look terrified". Still looking terrified he says "No, I'm not ok. I thought you were going to bite me!!" "Bite you! Why would I do that?" I say. "Because you were squirming all around and chomping at my ear!" he says. To which I respond to with a burst of laughter. I flash back to my dream and do recall doing both of those things, however did not think I was really doing them or was I?

I finally get him to believe that I was not actually trying to bite him (it was harder than you might think as we had an incident before this in which he was teasing me with a piece of chocolate and I MAY have bit him, accidentally, of course).

To this day he does not let me live down the Snaz fish incident. In fact, on occasion I find that he's named things 'Snaz Fisheries' (he made something on my computer this name, I forget what it was exactly). We still have discussions on how I came up with "Snaz fish" as the type of fish, which I honestly have no clue why that was it's name. :)

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Goin' Gangsta - the surgery

As most of you know I had foot surgery last week, if you want to learn about the process that worked up to the surgery feel free to read MonkeyPantalones (it's not really called that I just like how it sounds) and UniqueNewYork (same goes here, I dare you to try to say it 10 times fast).

First of all, I want to say I believe I was tricked into the surgery, had I known the truth I would have never gone through with it. Let me begin by starting with the actual surgery appointment:

I show up 15 minutes early and they get me in right away (lucky me!). I find this to be very confusing as both of the other appointments I had resulted in me waiting at least 45 minutes prior to seeing the doctor (I almost go and sit down in the waiting room anyways because I think the lady HAS to be talking to someone else, then realize he probably is ready to see me - since she's staring at me and no one else is in the waiting room). I follow the receptionist back to the torture chamber (I believe I now have the right to call it that). I go in and sit down with the nurse (the same nurse that when I took my sock off during a previous appointment with the doctor, looked at my foot like it had growths all over it [it doesn't]- WTF is she following me?! This time if she leans in to take a look I'm going to pretend like I have a leg spasm and ninja kick her in the eye.)

She goes over the "Post Surgical Instructions" which, in my opinion should have read "CHOOSE TO WALK OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN" instead at the top. Also, I believe they should have included a simple yes/no question at the beginning that stated "You are signing up to be in excruciating pain for the next 4 days (at the very least), if you think you can handle this check 'yes', if not check 'no' " (also, as a follow up question it should have asked if your significant other can handle this, the answer for Binderclips would have been a strong 'NO', maybe even with a "WAY JOSE" at the end). Most definitely I would've checked 'no', but I guess hindsight is 20/20.

After I read it a little more closely I see things on it like "YOU HAVE HAD A SURGICAL OPERATION..." (it was actually in all caps - "DANGER" should have definitely preceded it, if you ask me) and "Have your prescription filled immediately...", "Seepage of blood is normal...", and "You should only do a minimal amount of walking the first 4 days...".  I think 'What the...? I thought this was a minor procedure and no one said anything about a prescription and seepage of blood and limiting walking for the first 4 days and SEEPAGE OF BLOOD - WHAT ON EARTH??!!'. I suspect I could have easily ended up in hyperventilation mode, however somehow talked myself down from that ledge (probably because in situations like this I start looking around for the Candid Camera, like "ok, ok, ha, ha, very funny, next your going to tell me you are going to cut into my toe and file off some bone, right? Peter Funt come out from wherever you are").


Next thing I know he (the doctor not Peter Funt - I know, I had my hopes up too, believe me) comes in and gets to work immediately.....

To be continued

Monday, April 5, 2010

Major Foot Paint - Updated

From: HulaBuns
To: The Unfortunate Individuals that Work with HulaBuns

I'm having some major foot paint today as a result of surgery yesterday. I will be offline for the rest of the day today. Sorry for the inconvenience.

HulaBuns
Ninja Extraordinaire
Because I have one of these Inc.

In case you are wondering if this email was actually sent out, it was (Minus the signature line, that's reserved for use only with my personal email account: That is - if I can answer all 6 problems correctly. I'll have to cover that topic later at some point). I only noticed that it said "major foot paint" after I signed in today and had an email from a lead that said:

"I hope you feel better and have pain meds!

(btw: At first I thought you were getting a pedicure - major foot paint)"

Only I would mistype something in such a way. Thank goodness she didn't think I was calling myself Major Foot Paint because that's how I read her response to me at first. "At first I thought you were getting a pedicure, Major Foot Paint". I thought 'clearly she's sent this email to the wrong person, I'd never go by the name of  Major Foot Paint'. Although, from how this thing is bruising up I'm thinking that a major foot paint might be necessary.

More to come about the foot surgery, however I believe the best way to describe me and my antics around the house after the surgery is to say I was "Goin' Gangsta"....

Thursday, April 1, 2010

That's not my name

Because I'm not feeling well today (toe bump removal was today, gag, more to come on that later), I thought I'd post an oldie but goody.

One day Binderclips was watching Palladia (a HD TV station that shows concerts and such) and they were showing the Ting Tings playing in the Isle of Wight Festival. The Ting Tings are a band that play 2 songs that I like: (1) Shut Up & Let me Go and (2) That's Not My Name.

Well, I was in the back of the apartment and went out to the living room where he was watching this. When I noticed the Ting Tings were playing this is what ensued:

Me: "Have they played Say My Name yet?" (mistakenly calling it by the wrong name - a Destiny's Child song name).
Him: "No, why?!?!" very defiantly (thinking I just told him to say my name)
Me: Just as he responds I correct myself and say "I mean That's Not My Name"
Him: He looks at me more confused than ever and says "I know what your name is!"

Yes- this really happened, seriously I can't make this $hit up. Needless to say, there is a lot of confusion in our household because of situations like this. However, as one of my good friends likes to remind me "Confusion is a sign of growth", so we must be growing all the time! ;)