So, now that you've been introduced to Callie and Turner in The Armpit Incident post I can start sharing some of the crazy stuff that they do (and make me do). Starting with Callie liking to eat bunny poop while outside.
The picture below is a picture of what the bunny poop looks like and can be found on this blog with additional information about bunny poop and other topics, if you want to check it out.
On the day in question, I took Callie and Turner outside to find myself talking to them (as usual), this is how the conversation went:
Me: "Callie! Stop eating the rabbit poop, for god sakes!!" as she eats an entire pile of it and starts to search out additional piles to munch on.
Callie: Yes, I am aware that dogs don't talk, but if she could I'm sure she would have been saying "But Mom!! It tastes so yummy and it looks just like the vitamin bits in my food!! Mmmmmmm!!" This is what the actual vitamin bits look like, they're actually called Lifesource bits.
It's at this point that I think 'If only Callie was a vitamin bit discriminator like Turner' since he will eat everything but the vitamin bits in the food (and only after he's carried mouthfuls of it over to the rug in the kitchen and left a danger-zone of vitamin bits all over it).
Me: "Ick!!! Stop it right now! Nobody likes a poop eater, nobody!!"
Callie: Looks at me with sad puppy dog eyes "But Mom!" I also swear I heard her sniffle a little bit.
Me: "Big fat NO on that one Callie. No more eating bunny poop! I don't care how cute you are! No one likes a poop eater, no one!!" Just as I say it I that I realize that I can think of one person who WOULD like a poop eater - Me (as long as it was a Callie and Turner poop eater and was NOT named Callie or Turner). Before I know it, I've said this out loud and just in time for the maintenance guy to walk up and hear me. Crap....sigh.
After having a brief conversation with the maintenance guy and trying to explain (awkwardly, might I add) why I was talking about poop and poop eaters with the dogs, I go back inside.
When Binderclips gets home I tell him about it, he's not surprised by any of it (the part where I was talking to the dogs and the maintenance guy overheard me seems to be the least surprising part to him, go figure). He agrees that we could use a poop eater that would eat Turner and Callie's poop (that, again, was not named Callie or Turner).
Later that night we decided to go out to a local restaurant The Blue Moose. As soon as we walk in we give them a name and wait patiently by the specials sign. We're standing there a couple of minutes before Binderclips points at the specials sign and says "Poop eater".
I look at it and see that tilapia is on special. Ever since we caught the Dirty Jobs episode where Mike Rowe goes to a Fish Farm and learns that the primary function of the tilapia is to eat all the other fish that are being farmed's poop, we don't eat it anymore....If only I could find a school of tilapia to swim around in the backyard, then all of my poop problems would be solved. ;)
8 months ago