Thursday, May 2, 2013

In All Honesty?

In deep discussion about aeronautics at the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum in DC back in December. Clearly I knew more than this guy as he didn't have much to say. ;)
I have a serious question for everyone. And I've been asking myself this one a lot to try to determine the right answer.

Have you ever caught someone in a lie? If so, how did you handle it?

Now, let me start off by saying that I have not always been entirely honest about things and I am aware of this. I have told lies for a couple of reasons in the past, however I have entirely gotten away from doing this. As I've gotten older and more lets call it "mature" I see no point in it (clearly most of my posts show how truly "mature" I am - wink, wink).

I guess the reason I had done it in the past was to; not hurt someone's feelings, I was embarrassed about something, or I just wasn't as secure with my decision. Nowadays I don't think any of these are good reasons to lie (is there ever a good reason?). I've learned that it's more hurtful to not tell the truth then to lie and that I have to be very secure/sure of why I made the decision I did. Therefore, I'm less likely to be embarrassed by my decisions.

If I've ever lied to you and hurt you let me just say - I'm genuinely sorry. I'd also like to say that if you feel like confronting me on it - please do. I only ask that you email/call me directly, so we can discuss it with each other that way. Not only is it good for you to get it off of your chest, it's also good to be able to be confronted/confront someone. (Hey, not all conversations are flowers and rainbows...learning that and being able to handle it is also important.) Believe me, I have had plenty of awful confrontations in my life (most of them with addicts of some sort) - I've learned to do my best during these confrontations; staying true to myself while trying to remain compassionate to the other person's perspective.

It was a tad cold that day, so baby G was bundled up. Being that she was born in WI, she tends to like cold weather - go figure.
Anyways, a while back I caught a friend in a lie. I didn't call her out on it at the time and have struggled with confronting her on it. On one hand, I've wanted to confront her because it changed the way I viewed our friendship. On the other hand, I think she lied to not hurt my feelings, which, of course I can understand.

I keep asking myself what I would want if we're in her shoes and I'd like to be confronted, but I do know not everyone has the same perspective as me.

So what do you guys think? Has this ever happened to you?

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts! Later gators!

1 comment:

  1. Hmm, I think men and women see this differently. Men tend to lie in two conditions. One, if we're spinning a story and two, if we're protecting someone. We don't tend to lie if we don't care.
    I think with women there is a distinctly different thread.
    Women want certainty, of course whether they deliver it back is another matter. I think it part and parcel of the carrying and nursing of kids and so hard wired in. I think the quest for that certainty is the reason why you attempt to break the fella, and hate it and him if ever you succeed in doing so.
    Anywoos, you have to ask yourself why women lie. And no pulling punches. And not where there is a clean reason like with addicts. Just plumb why in the past you've lied.
    Oh, lying on the internet doesn't count, that's just good sense until you know someone well.