8 Legged Runner

One of my recent works of art...what do you think? I call it "I want to use all these colors in my living room, so I put them all in one painting" or "Not good to see on your EKG". :)

Hello folks!! Looking good! (I'm guessing you look good, I can't actually see you...but because you're a good looking bunch, I'm sure I'm right.)


Not much happening here, except the usual dysfunctional stuff. Since were on the topic of dysfunctional-ness I might as well share what happened last night with you.


1. I decide to go to bed and go into our bathroom (in the back portion of our house) to brush my teeth and wash my face. G is sleeping in her room and as usual, Baby A is sleeping on the couch (she falls asleep there every night next to me and I move her to her crib after I get ready for bed). Binderclips stays in the living room to make sure my danger baby (Baby A) doesn't do anything dangerous (even in her sleep she's dangerous).


2. While in the bathroom I notice a black spider hanging out (literally) on the wall. I immediately start to freak out but decide against screaming as I didn't want to wake the kids up (believe me, this was a very difficult feat).


3. I decide to hurry up (as fast as I freaking can) and do what I need to do then go get Binderclips to "take care" of the spider.


4. At this point, I turn back around to make sure the spider is where I left him (on the wall). NOPE. "Where is he??!! WHERE IS HE!!??" I think frantically as I scan the room.


5. I finally spot him running at me (Do spiders run? YES, THEY FREAKING DO!).


6. He makes a run for it under a squeegee we have sitting on the ground. I take this as my opportunity to "take care" of him. I start pressing on it but he tries to escape!!! I finally succeed but only after spastically moving about the room. I should note, not once did I scream during the entire ordeal.


7. I go out into the living room where Binderclips is and tell him I have to talk to him about "something important". He, pats the seat next to him (creepily) to tell me to sit next to him.


8. I ignore the creepiness and proceed to explain to him what happened with hand motions (think hand inside of a pretend puppet and explosion-type movements). He listens, looking at me as if I'm an alien (I ignore his looks and proceed in my explanation). I explain to him that "I was attacked....the spider was black with a red hue...he came running at me... I had to use the squeegee as a weapon..." and tell him I need his help "getting rid of it".


9. After I finish my very animated *handamation, he looks at me and says "Is that what you were doing back there?" very calmly.


10. I think "clearly, there is something wrong with him! How can one be soo calm about something soo scary!" I start looking at him like he's an alien.


11. I say "oh, you could hear me?" to which he responds with "Ummm, yes. You were making quite  a bit of noise banging stuff around."


12. "And you didn't think to come SAVE me??!!" I think but instead say, "I didn't scream but I wanted to, you should be proud of me." I proceed to have (what I think is) a deep conversation about how if a spider attacks me, it's game on. He continues to sit there calmly.


What did I learn in this situation? If a spider comes running at me, I will attack and Binderclips clearly is waaay to used to me. I'm thinking I need to start hiding in cupboards again to scare him.


Later gators!


Handamation = hand motions emphasizing what I'm talking about

Baby A - Makes Her Entrance

Baby A's inquisitive look

Wondering what I've been up to? 

Baby A decided to make her entrance on September 15! Only 9 days early! I thought for sure she was coming the week prior to that...I was having consistent Braxton Hicks (every 2-5 minutes for a couple days there) and that's what happened the day before Baby G decided to make her entrance (she was 11 days early).

Our little smiler, she's' always smiling in her sleep!

Any who, in case you were wondering (and really even if you're not, cause I'm gonna tell you anyways) how the whole labor and delivery thing went - I figured I'd share the story.

First thing's first though - isn't she cute??!! Seriously. She's probably the cutest thing you've ever seen, I'm sure of it. ;)

So back to the labor and delivery:

At around 4:30AM on 9/15 I woke up because I was uncomfortable. Thinking that I just needed to adjust myself and how I was sleeping because I looked like this and was HUGE:

I tried to adjust and realized my discomfort came about every 3-5 minutes. The real contractions had begun. Binderclips had went into Baby G's room around 2AM and had fallen asleep on her floor waiting for her to fall back asleep. To make matters worse, Baby G, who had never done anything like this before, somehow found her way to directly in front of her bedroom door to sleep. This made it near impossible for me to open the door and tell Binderclips what was going on without waking her up.

By 6:30AM my contractions had gotten more serious. I decided it was time to wake the hubs up. I opened up the door and peered into Baby G's room and whispered "this is it" over and over again until he woke up. He finally got up, called his parents to come and get Baby G and they showed up in between 7:30-8:00. By this time, my contractions were definitely getting stronger faster. I kind of struggled to get Baby G's diaper changed and get her dressed to head out the door with her Grandparents.

We arrived at the hospital at 9:00AM...so that makes the count for how many hours I was in labor at this point 4.5 hours. They checked me and I was only dilated to 4cm. By 9:30 they admitted us.

I also should mention that because my contractions were so powerful at this point I decided that standing up and leaning over onto the bed made them slightly (ever so slightly) less painful. From 9:30-10:00 I stood there taking my contractions in stride. Almost right on the dot, my water broke at 10:00.

I asked for an epidural immediately. They told me the anesthesiologist was giving another patient one at the time and that they needed my lab work before he could give me one.

It was amazing that I even survived the half hour between 10:00 to 10:30. I literally thought I might die. I continued to stand there, leaning over when contractions hit and got increasingly more painful. I kept asking where the anesthesiologist was and eventually all I could say was "please help" as my brain and mouth combined seemed to not function anymore than that. In my head I was saying the worst profanities you can imagine. I'd like to say that this is a testament to what it would take me to drop an f-bomb in public. I came close but not even childbirth itself was able to bring it out of me.

Do you know that when your water breaks things (and we'll just leave it at that) continue to find their way out? Well they do. Every time it happened I would say to the nurse "{insert object of your choice here} is coming out!!" and she would say "that's normal". It was around this time that the nurse said to me "Now, if you feel any pressure, you need to let me know as soon as possible."

Well, people, I felt some pressure right at 10:30. I told the nurse and she told me I needed to lay down. Did I mention that the anesthesiologist still hadn't came?? I laid down so she could check me, to which she said "Ok, honey you're ready to push."

"WTF!!?? Push? PUSH?? No. NO. I'm not ready to push! My body and this little girl were ready, I'M NOT READY! I didn't mentally prepare for having this baby with NO pain relief. OMG OMG OMG!! I'M NOT GOING TO MAKE IT! " I thought frantically.

It was at this point that I also started to think about how mad I was at Binderclips for doing this to me. As he walked around the room I thought "Must be nice to be able to walk around IN NO PAIN WHAT-SO-EVER....JERK!"...amongst other things.

At that point the doctor had made his way into the room and I began to push. By 10:37 we had welcomed a perfect little girl into this world!

The only difference between her and Baby G was a half of an ounce. I'd like to think my body hits it's max capacity when the baby gets to 7 lbs 13.5 oz (Baby G was 7 lbs 13 oz) and 21 inches (both were this long). (There must be no more room left at that point or something, who knows.) Baby A came out looking around at the world taking it all in almost immediately.

So, there you have it. I had Baby A au naturale. I guess the good thing is now I can say I did it once!  Enjoy the pictures!

The girls together, one of my favorite pictures